Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Truthful Tuesday - Downside to "A"

I've never hidden the fact that I have a Type "A" personality. I like control and order in my life.  I feel like there needs to be a plan.  I think that things should all have a place (in terms of organization).  Don't get me wrong... I'm not OCD, but I like things the way I like things.  It's who I am.  It's how I am.  Granted, having kids has definitely forced me to let go of some of the control and order and "go with the flow" a bit more.

There are downsides to everything.  Admittedly, having a Type "A" personality has some negatives too.  Case in point:
  • Asking for help.  I do not do it very often.  Matter of fact, I either need to be up a creek with no paddle (and you know what I mean), facing a crucial deadline with a gazillion things on my plate that all needed to be done yesterday, or facing an emotional meltdown (and that has happened a few times recently with all of these hormones running wild). 
  • With that said, I will only ask for help from people that I know I can count on.  If someone has given me reason not to trust them, or that they didn't come through for me in the past, or they basically stress me out when it comes to their "help"... I just don't ask for help.
  • The person I can count on the most is my husband.  Always!  Granted, we handle life's situations and even crisises differently... he always comes through for me.  The other person that always comes through for me is my sister.  Always!  Granted, she is a crazy-busy person who has enough on her plate for 10 people to deal with... yet she too always come through for me. 
  • Recently, we hired a very reliable, highly recommended lady to clean our house 1x per week.  This was a huge step for me (and my hubby) not only because we like to handle our own business (the control thing), but we also didn't want an extra bill each week.  However, I'm late in my pregnancy and I work a long day teaching and frankly... I'm just exhausted and can't physically do everything at this point.  So... being the thoughtful hubby he is (and fearing that I will fall apart emotionally if he didn't take action), Brian hired her on weekly.  Anyone else, would gladly give up the reins and let someone clean their house top to bottom.  Oh contrare mon frair!  Michelle has asked her to NOT do certain things (the control thing).  I told her not to change bed linens, towels, empty the dishwasher or fold the clothes.  Sound insane?  Well, believe it or not, those are things that are easy for me to do daily if not weekly and I find comfort and even solitude in doing those things.  Maybe "joy" is a bit of a strong word, but doing those things gives me control over several things in the house... an important feeling for a Type-A'er.  I asked her to just do the "cleaning"... the sweeping, mopping, vacuuming, cleaning of appliances, kitchen, bathrooms and the dusting.  All the crap I hate to do and don't have time to do.
Having this feeling to want to control things in my life is a need.  I just prefer to do most things myself (or with my husband's help) because I know it will get done the way I want it to be done.  If something doesn't meet my expectations and it has to do with me or my kids or my stuff, I often feel the need to redo it and fix it so it is "right."  I know, sounds crazy doesn't it?  Again, these are the downsides to having a Type "A" personality.  This really is just the truth about me.


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